What is it about taking your high schooler on a college visit that makes your stomach hurt? Maybe it’s the flood of informational brochures they give you – all with photos of attractive students smiling in their college logo sweatshirts. Perhaps it is the winding walking tour that goes in circles and always ends up in the bookstore/t-shirt shop. It could be the group tour meal of pressed chicken breast and green beans, or the price of tuition (usually big numbers in small print). But the most unnerving part of going on a college visit with your child is realizing that, as parents, none of it is under our control – not our students SAT scores or grades, not his list of honors and awards, not his study habits or ability to get along with roommates. We may be paying the bills, but the likelihood of being accepted into college, receiving a scholarship, succeeding academically, fitting in socially, and securing gainful employment are all out of parents’ hands.
Over the MLK break, I escorted my high school junior to the University of Tulsa for a visit. Since this is my third child, I’ve already visited multiple schools in multiple states. (Amazingly, they all claim with certainty that they are the finest university in the country.) At times, I looked at him and wondered how he’d ever make it on his own. Other times, I beamed with pride at how easily he met other students and introduced himself to counselors and coaches. Mainly, I remembered how much fun those days were, when the world looked so big and beautiful and easy to conquer.
