“Kindergarten” is a word that carries deep memories and emotions.

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Do you remember your kindergarten teacher? Can you feel the spectrum of emotions on the first day of school ranging from giddiness to fear? Can you see your kindergarten room? Do memories of your kindergarten include naps, cubbyholes, coat hooks, standing in line, giant sixth-graders, “centers”, and reading, reading, reading?

I answer those questions each year when I visit and speak at “kindergarten roundups” hosted by area elementary schools. These are events in which pre-kindergarten parents and their children are invited to school for an evening of information and entertainment. The principal and kindergarten teachers provide a glimpse of the school and the kindergarten year — schedule, environment, curriculum, activities, expectations and goals. The pre-K kids work on art projects and visit the kindergarten classrooms.

We understand that parents have choices about where their kids attend school, and we want to make sure that they have complete and accurate information about their neighborhood RISD school. The evening is a wonderful opportunity to show the school to parents, answer questions, address perceptions, and confirm and dispel rumors. Parents usually leave the event confident that the school will provide a safe environment and an excellent education.

Kindergarten roundups are an example that “the more things change, the more they stay the same.” There is always a wide range of parents, from the anxious parents who are venturing into school with their firstborn to the all-knowing parents who have been on the school journey for at least a few years. The questions are understandably predictable: How does one teacher handle 22 5-year olds? How will you meet my daughter’s needs? Will my son be safe at school? Can my daughter be in a class with her best friends? How much homework will my son have? 

Each question is answered thoroughly and compassionately — schools realize that they are being entrusted with parents’ flesh and blood (aka “precious”, “baby”, and “angel”), and that the first day of kindergarten will likely be more difficult for the parents than the child.

I enjoy sharing with these pre-K parents (soon-to-be-PTA-members) that they are embarking on a wonderful K-12 journey. Sure, it’s a roller-coaster ride, but for most families there are more highs than lows, more carnivals than conferences, and more joys than concerns.

And there’s no better place to begin that journey than in your neighborhood school. Lifelong friendships for children and parents alike are formed during elementary school, whether in the classroom, on the soccer field, in Scouts, at slumber parties, or any other place where two or more kids gather. Our family’s most recent reminder of this truism is that our daughter Meredith is a bridesmaid in three weddings this summer, and each bride is a cherished friend from elementary school (and, of course, two of those three couples are intra-LH romances).

As a “veteran” parent who is still closely connected to his children’s lives (hey, it’s my job even during and after their college years), I noticed several things at kindergarten roundup that struck a chord of disappointment. Unfortunately, I knew some of these parents would not maintain the eve-of-kindergarten excitement, interest, passion, support, concern, and expectations for their children’s life, well-being, and education. I too often see parental energy and enthusiasm wane as children head to junior high and high school. Imagine the success of secondary students and schools if parents remained as engaged through graduation as they were during the K-6 years. 

Similarly, I saw a kindergarten choir perform (not just sing) with unbridled joy and fun. I am convinced that learning throughout high school and beyond can be fun without sacrificing expectations and rigorous curriculum. In this age of state and federal accountability standards, however, we have sacrificed a measure of joy, exploration, adventure and wonderment for the sake of “standards”.

I am not sure whether “all I really need to know I learned in kindergarten” (as a popular book title suggests), but I know that many core life skills and values were learned during that very important year.  Fortunately, our kindergarten classes still teach those basic lessons of life, living and learning.

See you at school.