Leide, Carousel and Adam (posthumously) sent me, not too long ago, a very special collection of rules for the serious dog.

You see, Leide is a very gentle, loving Doberman – she saved the life of Saffron, her feline companion, more than once.

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Cari, as she prefers to be called, is a very bouncy, happy Yorkie.

Their dear friend Adam went to heaven awhile back after having lived a very long and happy life – he was the first dog.

Each of these dear canines took and take their roles very seriously.

These guys were surfing the Internet, as I understand it, when they came across some information they thought I may find interesting.

Unfortunately, we don’t know to whom we need to attribute the credit of authorship, but we thought the information was very important to pass on.

The following is referred to as the Basic Rules for Dogs:

  • Visitors. Quickly determine which guest is afraid of dogs. Charge across the room, barking loudly, and leap playfully on this person. If the human falls down on the floor and starts crying, lick their face and growl gently to show your…concern.
  • Barking. Because you are a dog, you are expected to bark. So bark – a lot. Your owners will be very happy to hear you protecting their house, especially late at night while they are sleeping safely in their beds. There is no more secure feeling for a human than to keep waking up in the middle of the night and hearing your protective bark, bark, bark…
  • Licking. Always take a big drink from your water dish immediately before licking your human. Humans prefer clean tongues. Be ready to fetch your human a towel.
  • Doors. The area directly in front of a door is always reserved for the family dog to sleep.
  • Dining Etiquette. Always sit under the table at dinner, especially when there are guests, so you can clean up any food that falls on the floor.
  • Housebreaking. Housebreaking is very important to humans, so break as much of the house as possible.
  • Going for Walks. When out on a walk with your human, never go to the bathroom on your own lawn.
  • Couches. It is perfectly permissible to lie on the new couch after all your humans have gone to bed.
  • Chasing Cats. When chasing cats, make sure you never quite catch them – it spoils all the fun.